Thanksgiving this year was difficult for my husband and me; my daughter traditionally has all the in-laws to her house, and still planned to, even during the Coronavirus. Although we love our in-laws, we felt that sitting down with at least 15 plus relatives during the Pandemic did not feel safe for us seniors, so we regretfully declined. We did get together a few weeks later, just our two households- and actually felt we had more time and focus with a smaller gathering. It was so nice to see the grandkids after so many months! However, I suspect that some family members took it personally that we did not show up.
Yes, ‘Covid Fatigue’ has definitely set in for most of us, and although the infection rates are soaring, each household will have to make its own decisions about how to celebrate the Season. I talk to clients who feel emotionally estranged from their relatives because of decisions they have made. How do you keep priorities straight when maybe hurt family members take a decision of yours so personally that they threaten never to visit you again?
As you may know, I tend to coach being truthful to yourself and your own needs first. This is because if you give in to a demand that may go against your ethics, your safety or your beliefs, it eventually backfires and you end up feeling resentful. Also, it’s common that if you try to satisfy everyone else you end up exhausted (it happens a lot during this Season, even without a pandemic!) And then your Immune System is more vulnerable.
Humans are notorious for self-gratification and quick fixes, and often reap the consequences later. Generally if there is enough respect, love and acceptance between the parties, some sort of compromise can be worked out. I know this caution and vigilance feels like it has gone on forever. But if you can take a longer perspective, you can look back and be content with your capacity for patience and problem-solving. Your Wise Mind prevailed!
Please consider your priorities this Season; remember that keeping yourself safe also helps your loved ones be safe too. There will be better times to travel and congregate, to hug and be hugged. Meanwhile, send your loving messages and gifts via this wonderful technology that is keeping us all connected!
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