What is dialectical thinking? How can this help my anxiety?

These days during the pandemic, the demonstrations, and the political climate, I find myself talking more philosophically with my clients, many of them in their twenties, who are trying to stay emotionally regulated.  That’s tough in the calmest of times, let alone now! The world seems so fraught and often they are hopeless about their future.

So here is where a philosophical concept as old as Plato and Marx may be useful. The word “dialectic” comes from two Greek roots, “dia” (both) and the lectics (dialogue/discussion). Essentially it describes the notion that two opposing ideas can be true at the same time, and that holding both to be true allows for a balance between acceptance and change, both of which are necessary for establishing ‘ a  life worth living’. (that’s where the concept comes into the psychological realm) An example from our current reality is that chaos can be both disruptive and anxiety provoking on a social level, but also beneficial to upend the status quo and make us hopeful for a different, positive future.

The issue with being a human is that our nervous systems are built to expect a certain amount of calm and predictability, but to still have some exciting moments where (preferably) we can have some agency.  However when our whole environment feels so uncertain and there seems no ability to control anything, we start getting really frightened on a visceral level. Our amygdala, the alarm system of our animal brain, just won’t shut off. We also yearn for calmer times, or start to get nostalgic about old, fond memories, which in reality might not be so realistic or beneficial either.

Since the art of life is essentially how to accept that some things are not in our control, and understanding some things we can change, it is helpful to remind ourselves of this. Even if we have small areas of our lives that we are in charge of (like what to make for a healthy dinner) but we cannot change the political climate right now, then there can be a small experience of self-mastery. What most of us know as we mature is that change is always going to happen and if we resist it, we suffer.

If you are having a rough time with this social situation at present, please contact me and we can find a more effective way to help you manage. The practice of Dialectical Behavior Therapy might be just the framework and skills you need.